The Twelve Days of Christmas – an update

On the twelfth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Twelve chicken drumsticks,
Eleven crack pipes piping,
Ten lords exploiting,
Nine ladies texting,
Eight maids serving milky lattes,
Seven swans a-ttacking,
Six geese with bird flu,
Five plastic rings,
Four calling birds shot dead,
Three battery farmed French hens,
The two turtle doves are now extinct
And a partridge in a chopped down pear tree.